#YBL

"She wanted him more than he wanted her. And that’s when shit hit the fan. She couldn’t have him as she wanted him”…….​

I must say, I thought I wasn’t going to have a summer this year. The past two weeks I was truly living the definition of an “YOLO” life style. Spending money, cashing out checks, hanging out with the girls, meeting new friends, not giving one damn. I haven’t been doing a great job at my job. I’m slacking. As much as I want to continue these fun “YOLO” times, I have to get back to work. Change is always good but having some type of consistency about you is even better. I love that fact I have “summer friends” and that my “summer friends” and “best friends” can all get along. I love woman I can talk to, relate with, and understand. With me going out a lot, my stress level is low. But that can also be because I’m at the gym four days out the week. A month ago, I couldn’t sleep for two weeks straight. I was having mild anxiety attacks. I was stress. Work and my new “situation-ship” were sucking all the energy out of me. And before I knew it, I wanted to explode. Before now, I wasn’t going out often. I would stay in the house. I would only go out every so often. A part of me wasn’t thrilled about going out or hanging out. I wanted to work and get myself to the next level. What changed is when I felt myself becoming the anti-social type. I’m this outgoing person with a big personality at times. I was hindering this part of myself thus far, leading me to feel as if I was going to explode. And explosion is what happened. I was doing too much with no direct outlet. My main project fell out my hands at work, I couldn’t sleep at night, and my situation-ship with “this guy” was going wayyyyyyy to far unexpected. So I went out living the YOLO life. You can say basically me sitting sick here trying to do a Netti pot treatment at 4am is a sign telling me to sit my booty down somewhere. And that is what I’m planning to do. I’m 25 and yes I would love to have fun all the time and not worry about a damn thing, but I have to shit to get back to. With me a young black independent woman, I’m learning it’s all about balancing your life out in the end. Yes, I want to get to the next level in both of my careers and yes I want a relationship and yes I want to make my family even more proud. The one main important factor that I have forgotten in this past month in a is why I’m doing this. I’m doing this because I’m the one who made it out. I’m not just doing this for myself, I’m doing this for every black girl in America who thought they will never make it. So here is to me, eliminating all my distractions and getting back the grind once again. Both careers will succeed for I am every black woman’s dream.